Prince Calming refers to a senior faculty member at N1, who is one of my mentors here. As his pseudonym suggests, he is a calm and quiet person, not much given to display of emotions or making authoritative statements/judgements about anything or anyone at N1. He pretty much keeps to himself and is rarely seen at our tea shop/faculty mess - the two famous hotspots for N1 gossip.
At the same time, however, he is very well informed about institute affairs and does not shy away from expressing his opinion and taking a stand on important matters.
He does so, without making a big noise and more often than not, accomplishes his objective. Then, he moves on to other things.
One of his most endearing qualities is that he keeps an eye out for the well being of his younger colleagues. Many of us freely approach him if we have any questions or concerns about professional matters and receive useful and effective advice from him.
In the last fortnight, I faced some difficult situations at N1 and was a frequent visitor to his office. It also happened that one day, we both had to travel together to a nearby city (about two hours drive away) for some important institute work. I learnt a lot of things while conversing with him and I am sure he won't mind if I shared some of them on this blog (although I am equally sure that he does not know about the existence of this blog.)
For starters, just a day before our trip, I had had a bit of a showdown with another colleague in PC's presence about an institute matter. We had a difference of opinion about something and since this other colleague has a habit of continuously talking without giving others a chance, I ended up raising my voice and sharply contradicting him. I believed then (and still do) that my point was valid, but I could have certainly put it across in a softer voice :)
During the drive to the nearby city, I asked PC how he manages to remain calm in the face of extreme provocation. With a smile he answered, "it comes with age."
"Can you please elaborate on that," I asked, not content with his cryptic reply. He obliged me by telling me some stories from his first few years in his faculty position, when his reaction to certain events at his former institution were similar to mine above. However, unlike me, after some of his outbursts, he got into trouble. I found it very difficult to relate PC's current personality to the stories he was telling me and thought, "wow, there's hope for me!"
One day, I was feeling very overwhelmed about some problems and asked PC for advice. Instead of encouraging my ranting, however, PC immediately pointed out that the trait that could be most harmful to one's career is negativity. N1 is not perfect - no place is. But, as a responsible member of this institute, if someone feels that something is amiss or needs to be corrected, one should take initiative and bring it up confidently with the concerned people/committee. This is much more useful than gossiping about the problem. He then gave some more examples of some issues that he had faced and how he resolved them. "But, Dr PC, " I asked, "in your position and at your stage of career, you can bring up issues fearlessly and people will listen to you, where as, if I bring them up, I will be immediately branded a trouble maker."
He again corrected me and said that as a member of N1 community, I have every right to raise an issue and should do so. However, he also warned against expecting results overnight. The gist of his advice seemed to be to take up the matter and pursue it patiently.
This was a timely wake-up call to me before I drifted into complacence and negativity.
Yet another occasion on which PC gave me some useful advice was after a meeting. I was extremely annoyed at an administrative official who, I felt, had made a disparaging and factually wrong statement about our department. I asked PC if I should confront this person. PC said that if I really felt so strongly about it, I should do so, but that I should wait for 24 hours before writing or talking to this person. As it turned out, those 24 hours were enough for me to calm down and realize that (a) I had misunderstood the context in which this statement was made and (b) I was not the right person to bring this up, anyways. Incidentally, this reminds me of my PhD supervisor, who once said that the "reply" tab in the email inbox should be renamed "reflect".
I am now out of "the blues" [even literally so as the monsoons seem to be ending] and learning to do my job, calmly and effectively, thanks to interesting experiences and mentors like PC.
I would love to hear back from readers who have learnt important socio-administrative lessons from other mentors. From the more senior readers, of course, I would truly appreciate more advice and tips :)